miramiramazing

Four hours and two pots of tea later , my tea-time guests have now left and I must say , we had a smashing time   Here's the evidence

We had a wonderful timeand four hours somehow flew by.

My scones were a disaster , but the Gayatri cake was light and yummy. There is a little bit left if anyone would like a piece.

Now I want some real food. A crunchy leafy green salad , some spaghetti with a little virgin olive oil , parmesan and a few drops of truffle oil ... mmmmmmm

Laters 

I was going to write something else about pain, emotional pain ...what was it ? A flash back to an Ingmar Bergman film that I saw.. must be over 20 years ago .. don't remember which one .. but it was a scene that contained an " aha " moment.

Liv Ullman was the woman and Elliot Gould was the man.

She was tormented and struggling with pain .. angst ...wrestling with emotional demons that had such a strong hold on her that she could not cry or utter any kind of sound in order to express and get some kind of relief. These agonising emotions were inside causing excruciating pain. I think she breaks a glass and grips the sharp pieces in her hand to cause herself physical pain , because that physical pain she could deal with ,Physical pain was somehow preferable and indeed the only way she had found to get some sort of relief.

This strong scene that has stayed with me for years and helped me understand deep psychic, emotional pain.

*shudders*

Are you still with me ?

i'm making such a song and dance about this aren't I ?

*chuckles*

Had a shower and washed hair ... about to get dressed and then nip down to the shop.

Take out smelly rubbish on the way out and bag of things to be recycled as the bottle bank is next to the shop

Smart. Efficient. Good logistics there, Mira

Need :

Cream cheese ( for topping )
eggs
milk
lemon
butter
ground cloves ( all out )

That's it

TTFN

x

There is wisdom in this. Easy for me to say , as I'm not in any pain at the moment , BUT , I do know from experience that pain is inevitable and the best thing to do is to breathe your way through it.

As for expressing true feelings .... I might just do that today , when my guests arrive *wicked chuckle *

Yes .. I am in a playful, yet profound mood

from www.kabbalah.com

Sunday, September 7

One of the biggest risks we can take is to feel. According to Rav Ashlag, the nature of human is to run away from pain. There's no free will and no exceptions to that rule.

Why do we check out emotionally, or avoid going out on dates, or making new friends? We can't stand the pain! A guarded heart affects everything we do, every relationship we have, and ultimately our connection to God.

Today, unchain your heart. Take a chance on love, or making a new friend, or revealing your true feelings. Let people see what's beneath your hood. There's something so liberating about exposing yourself. That sounds wrong, but you know what I mean.

I have now vacuumed

and

baked a cake

Some tidying has been done

Filing of papers

Fluffing up of cushions

Now into the kitchen to bake a cake

Good morning. Another cloudy dull and rainy day.  Most plants of the balcony have done their bit , drowned or died a natural death, except for these geraniums that are still going strong.

Rain , rain and more dullness. Stillness . A very quiet and peaceful Sunday morning. Hardly a sound now . Even little Tim in the flat below, who an hour ago was running around like ferret possessed is now quiet. His parents must have taken out his batteries or something.

I'm slowly  programming myself  to " tidy and clean "  It will take a while. Breakfast first and then any other excuse i can come up with . Rashid, Judith and Mike and coming to tea. I think I'll bake a Gayatri cake and maybe some of my sour dough bread sandwiches ? We shall see. Que sera sera